I know, I have abandoned you once again. I guess life just moved in crazy motions these last few months. Think of my last post but just a little bit more intensified.
Since finishing high school, I have realised that there is this small frame between finishing a chapter and starting a new one, where you feel completely out of place. At least that is what I think. Ever since finishing school, I have vanished off the face of the planet (social media wise) – not contacting any past friends, not catching up or even posting of my life after school. I have completely vanished. At first, I loved it, the freedom to act the way I want, reinvent myself and not be bound by my past. I still love it in a sense. But going back on social media brings about a whole heap of depressive motions along with it. I look at everyone around me, and they seem inextricably happy, free, young and reckless, whereas I’m living the opposite.
I know about the idea that social media only reveals false happiness. But why do I look at it and think that their lives are so adventurous, whereas mine is monotonous, almost stagnant. It seems like they have everything sorted. They are going off to university, they have their clothing style sorted etc. whereas I am still managing to try and be productive throughout a day.
I guess that’s why I come here every now and again. Because with all the chaos that seems to surround me, I write, in order to cope. I have written consistently nearly everyday, I just haven’t been writing here. At the end of the day, this makes everything better, as if someone out there in this vast world, understands where I come from.
I am grateful for my life and everything that I have in it. Everything will make sense, this blurred path will eventually clear up.
I’ll see you soon everyone, hopefully.